Why Insurance in America sucks pt. 4 (this time I'll be brief) and...

Actually this isn't so much about insurance as medical care because in general the problem is medical care- which includes dental. Part of the reason that medical care sucks in the United States of America is that there are too many hidden costs and you don't find out about them until after the fact.

You don't find out that your insurance won't pay for a new dentist in the office you've been going to for years until after he's done a full round of X-Rays on your mouth because you assumed that the office took your insurance when in fact it apparently depends doc by doc. You have to ask! Buyer beware!! 

You can't find out the doctor's office is going to charge you for the experimental treatments they offered (or how much!) so that you can decide if you want to buy the device the doctor is recommending (not covered by insurance) until weeks after you had the appointment because in some cases the front office doesn't even know- their billing office makes those decisions.

You can't find out the difference in cost of one emergency room visit from another- so unlike other markets you can't shop around. But that's not how the "free market" is supposed to work: i.e. I can go from one car dealer to another to find out who is going to offer me the best deal or if Argonaut Liquor is offering a wine on sale I can get Keg Liquor to give me the same wine for the same price. But you usually won't/can't find medical care costs up front and can't choose which is going to be cheapest or ask them to give it to you for the same price. And no, you don't always get the best value for your money. I mean after all, a urine analysis is what it is. Do you need to pay $500 more for it at one hospital than at another?

So that's all I'm going to say about that. For now. Except that I think we are all suckers for not screaming at our government to give us a single payer option and giving it to us now. They can pay for wars that go on and on and on without any kind of result and not bat an eye but doing the right thing on healthcare is too expensive. Well, that's not the reason, I know, but I am not going into a political rant right now.  :)

Quack, Quack.

It's been pretty dry and fairly warm here (except for a couple of days when we dipped down with the whole country into the ungodly cold temperatures a few weeks back) and there's not a whole lot of snow around. We could go on some nice walks except for my shoulder still makes it difficult so these are pictures taken from last year...

What I'm reading? 
I've finished reading a friend's novel right now and giving him some feedback. It's a good solid literary work and I hope he finds a publisher although it's a struggle out there as we all know. 
Hope things are going well where you are!

Writer's cramp...

I am in the last stretch of my project (which has been a LONG time in the making) and I am happy about heading into the finish line. I have my sights on what I want to say, how I want it to look, what the ending should look like but I find the words seem to fail me as I go to put it on paper. It's so frustrating (to say the least!!). It's times like these that I find the words of Hemingway comforting...

There is no rule on how to write. Sometimes it comes easily and perfectly; sometimes it's like drilling rock and then blasting it out with charges. -Ernest Hemingway

In the meantime, I've done some editing on my pictures, experimenting with the wildflowers (and a flower that Mo recently planted) that have colored my world. Hope they do the same for you!

Her body calculated to a millimeter to suggest a bud yet guarantee a flower. -F. Scott Fitzgerald

 All flowers in time bend towards the sun, I know you say there's no one for you, But here is one. -Jeff Buckley

 "And the heart that is soonest awake to the flowers is always the first to be touch'd by the thorns." -Thomas Moore

 Art is the unceasing effort to compete with the beauty of flowers - and never succeeding. -Gian Carlo Menotti

"All good writing is swimming under water and holding your breath."  -F. Scott Fitzgerald

Inspired

A post or two ago I mentioned I was reading an autobiography of Oscar Wilde. It's dense reading so I am taking it slow, savoring the reflections on art and life that were so much a part of his daily diatribe. O.W. was a believer in art and beauty and his life reflected that belief at every hairpin curve of his impressive life. I am impressed by the depth of his belief.  As I read, I dig deeper to have my own writing reflect the beauty I want to see in the world and that I catch glimpses of as I make my daily trek through normality. Oscar pressed the bounds of propriety in his approach to life and his craft. He believed that literature was the "supreme art..." one that could "transform a painting into words, a life into an artifice."*

I too believe in beauty and love and art. I believe it has the potential to transform those who read it for good... or for ill. A teacher and I once had a discussion about the books she was recommending to her class. At that time she felt they would only read books they could relate to, stories that were spawned from authors who lived similar lives. At this point I offered a suggestion that went a bit against the grain of common knowledge. While I understood why she and her fellow teachers felt they needed to offer reading material that reflected the life kids knew in order to engage them, "How," I queried, "would they imagine more?" How do they imagine a different kind of life than violence and ugliness if all they read are books that have the same reality that takes place in their homes? If they never read a book like A Wrinkle in Time or War of the Worlds will they dream of the stars and what lies beyond? Would they create fantasies of grand adventures and exciting travels if they haven't read Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea or The Narnia Chronicles? No, I proposed, I fear they... you and I... would not. Your dreams and aspirations would remain within the realm in which they were created- a world of day to day reality which may include abuse, drugs, alcoholism and gangs.... (fill in the blank)

Too sad to even think about really.

So Oscar Wilde inspires me to do more than write about the day-to-day, regular occurrances. I am emboldened to "take on [the] mask" of the writer in order to speak truth-- a truth that I hope will challenge readers to search for more out of life than what is "normal".

What authors have inspired you?



*Oscar Wilde by Richard Ellman, p. 339.

Gentle fields

With all the NaNo participants working away so diligently on their projects I am reminded that I need to spend more time writing. So, having been inspired by my NaNo friends, I am going to try to get more writing done and my posts are going to be a bit shorter -at least for now. 

As the approaching holiday eeks ever closer (and in spite of what you might see at the stores, I am not talking about Christmas) I wanted to post this very Thanksgivingy scene. I'm gearing up, are you? I need to roast my pumpkin for my homemade pumpkin pie or it wouldn't be Thanksgiving. Any recipes you get out just for the day? 

Next to last day...

Tomorrow is the last day of the 31 days of blogging with NaBloWriMo. This is probably as good a time as any to reflect on the challenge that writing on my blog every day for 31 days in a row has presented. I have to admit I haven't gotten much writing done in the past two weeks on my WIP. While this is partly because I have been busy and time and energy have kept me from focusing on it, it is also true that writing on my blog has been more of a distraction than I care to admit. In the past few months I have gotten into a rhythm of posting twice maybe three times a week. Generally I post pictures that I have taken in my daily life and write a bit about the place or thoughts that I have while walking but the posts don't take a lot of writing energy and I don't spend of lot of mental space thinking about what I will write. The past few weeks I have definitely spent more energy writing something worth reading than I might have had I been on my regular schedule. On the other hand, with my schedule being as tight as it's been this month, it's been nice to do a bit of constructive writing in the short space a blog post takes. But the question remains, might I have written a bit more on my project had I not felt so compelled to blog every day? Probably. So perhaps the first lesson of the month is that my schedule of posting two or three times a week is probably all I have energy for.

The second part of my reflection concerns my pleasure in blogging. I have stated before that I began blogging for my own purposes. It was a place to write when I was at work and it was often little more than a sounding board and I enjoyed it. I rarely had commenters and when they commented, I was often surprised. Since I now enjoy so many friends in the blogging community, I find that adds to my enjoyment in the blogging experience. Of course there is always the reality that you hope what you write will compel people to respond and when they don't (and you are used to having some response) then you feel a bit lonely. Having said all that, I still feel that the main reason to keep blogging is because I enjoy it and when I cease to enjoy it, then perhaps it is time to quit. At this point, it is still a pleasure not only to post my pictures on my blog but to connect with other bloggers. I do find that I need to be a bit more balanced in how I do these things. Since I am a full-time working mom, time is a limited commodity. I can't keep on running at full speed and do justice to my writing when I am exhausted (which is why sometimes it is easier to blog and read other's blogs than it is to write) so going back to the previous post schedule with a few other changes regarding how I blog should be a step in the right direction.

However! I have had a small breakthrough on the actual physical exhaustion I have been experiencing. During the past month I had a doctor's appointment and I found out I was anemic. As a result I was probably running completely out of steam with just life. I've been taking some iron tablets for the past two weeks and feel better already and am hopeful that I will continue to do so. With this in mind, I hope the added energy will help me focus on my writing when I do have the time.

But the real focus of course has to be- as we all know- on my writing. So if you enjoy my pictures and wonder at times why I don't post more about writing or on other topics, it's because I am (hopefully) busy typing away on my project and the pictures I post are just a gift that I want to share with my blogging friends.

Save the words

I'd like to take this moment to recognize the loss of an organization that has been out there on the edge, fighting the good fight as extinction of so many of their beloved drew ever nearer. Their website was developed in an attempt to connect those who wished to help save a single word from dying out from amidst all those more common words that are used each day. The adoptees then commit to keep it and use it so that it is no longer in danger of extinction. Unfortunately they were unable to keep on with the struggle and when I went to their site tonight to direct you to their website I found their website down! SAVETHEWORDS.ORG is no more... and the loss of the word continues on.

Fortunately we still have the The Phrontistery for obscure words.

I like this one...

amarulence	n	1731 -1755
bitterness; spite
After losing her job to a less qualified man, she was full of amarulence.

It's not quite the same as adopting one like on the Savethewords.org, but it will work. 

On the mountaintop...

Come sit with me, my friend
with pen and paper we shall sit
and from such views we shall write
wondrous tales of
Crossing the harsh Rocky Mountains in the dead of winter,
     skeletons along the way their stories untold

Is it an eagle? Is it a snake?

I'm developing a new character and I have a pretty clear picture of who I think she is. If you were to name her spirit animal what would you say it was?  

She advances down the street with a confidence that holds life itself in contempt, she has a "you-aren't-going-to-defeat-me" gait that carries her around The Common and, fortunately, well beyond The Peonage. She plows through the cracked and crooked Cyprus door, pausing only to allow her cornea time to adjust to the dim, the duskiness that inhabits the cleavage of the walls scurries across the floorboard and over the surface of the hovel that has somehow gained the reputation as a shop. Compound odors of garlic, curry, cigar, incense, dust, and ancient artifact assault the nasal passages of her finely refined nose resulting in a stallioned flare just as the irritation overwhelms her and explodes into the silent gloominess. Plainly the war on grime has been lost and she swats at her hand-pressed sierra-sand-colored skirt and fitted white blouse to prevent any possible incursions to her personage. The tailor-made "Refined Explorer" boots she purchased in Milan wrinkle of their own volition in distaste, disgusted by their proximity to the dirt floor which had undoubtedly been the bed of herd animal at some not too distant past. Cosmetically enhanced nails brush a single stray hair that has rebelliously crept down out of sternly drawn locks and smooths it back in place as she prepares herself for a wait that would have made Abraham impatient. 

Transcending earth

Place... 

in some of the most memorable fiction or movies, the place, like Macondo the village in "One Hundred Years of Solitude," takes on a character of it's own

.

It has a life that transcends time. It is more than a communal dwelling where the inhabitants greet each other at the grocery store or hang out at the local coffee shop and gossip. The place becomes a character as full of life as the congregants who live there. Magical things happen that can't quite be explained and events in the "real" world seems as distant as Neil Armstrong strolling moonside. You can think about this place and you can dream of it, but you'll never completely capture the essence of the place that is beyond time- 

Unless, you are the Creator of that Place!   

Lessons from Libaria for Writers

In 2004, I was the last ditch hiree by the last-resort Principal of a middle school here in Denver, Colorado. I, however naively, was thrilled with the job and jumped in wholeheartedly to the position. Soon thereafter I attended a meeting where a plea was made for reviewers "We need YOU!" The chairperson squawked into the squawky school microphone. An idea had begun forming in my mind, and as the meeting droned on I mulled the pros and cons. As we finished up, I approached the head of the department and asked her for special dispensation so that I (not a teaching librarian) could join THE REVIEW COMMITTEE. She agreed and the rest was, if not history, then at least in the past. SO... I was a paraprofessional librarian who purchased books on a very limited budget (at least most years) for kids who desperately needed good books (most of the kids in my school were very low readers) to read and I reviewed new books that were being published by mainstream publishers... 

I learned a few things. (which is why I joined the Review Committee in the first place. I wanted to review so that I could be a better writer-- it seemed logical that in reviewing other people's books that I would learn a few things about writing. But another bonus: I got free books for my library!)

The first thing I learned is that there are lot of books that are published that are not good. Each month we would gather together and choose from piles and piles of books that publishers would send out and I was astounded at how many of the books we received that were just terrible. As a librarian this was bad news. I had a limited budget. I could not afford to spend money on bad books. I had to learn how to find the books that were worth buying. As an author, I was discouraged to see so many poorly written books sitting on shelves. It seemed to me that this meant that publishers were spending money on books that would not sell... 

My responsibility as a reviewer then led me to a conclusion: Although I hated to tell people that the books they had written were not very good, nevertheless, my colleagues were also working with limited budgets. My reviews were one of the tools they would use to decide how they would purchase materials (but let's be real here I am not god-- my reviews were only one of the tools they might use-- most librarians look at more than one review and even then may bypass reviews if they need a book of a certain genre or topic) . SO It seemed to me, that candid honesty was necessary. If a book was bad, I had to write a bad review. 

I generally read middle school books as those were the audience I was purchasing for but I also read for high school and elementary age children as it became overwhelming to have too many novels to read each month. I found some wonderful books that I read with gusto and recommended to teachers in my building who then passed them on to their students- books I have since seen on the tables of Barnes and Noble. (I like to think it was a slow word of mouth growth that put them there. Barnes and Noble was definitely not promoting The Girl who Could Fly when it was first published!) 

The second thing I learned was that authors did not like getting bad reviews. Not that I blamed them (nor do I still). I have had the bad experience of having manuscripts rejected... it's no fun! And it is less fun to have someone say that you have too many characters and your plot line is disjointed, etc. One writer bullied the reviewer into changing her review and another was extremely cocky and annoying, also pushing for a good review. Lessons were not learned by either writer which is too bad. They were both self-published and I would imagine they will remain that way. As writers we put ourselves out there and reviews are part of the gig. It's part of life. When I was a singer and butchered a song, you could see it written all over the audience's faces (if they were even bothering to look at you). My darling Mo is my harshest critic-- which can be difficult sometimes-- but I have become a better writer as result of his criticism. And even when his criticism is wrong (in other words he isn't seeing what I am getting at at all) it is because my description is poorly done or my dialogue is confusing, etc. so he's still right. Critique is a time for learning. There is a time for cheerleading and supporting... but there is also a time to give real advice, real appraisal. And it's important- maybe more important than the strokes. 

I am reading Hemingway's biography. His editor and closest friend, Max Perkins was the one person who would tell him that what he had written was not his best work. He would encourage him to go back and edit out parts that should be cut or "go back to the drawing board" on others. When he passed away, Hemingway wrote,"Max was a great, great editor and a wise and loyal friend." Hemingway's final works of fiction that were published a few years after Perkins death were notable because only in sections is the writer's touch still evident- his biographer speculates that if his editor and friend had been around he may have been able to distill the best parts of Across the River and drop the worst... 

Even great writers need people to tell them when they have lost their way.          

Book nerds at Christmas

The Christmas Story Blogfest has not faired well as far as participants (I know it's a busy time!) but I plan on posting a story by Christmas Eve (hopefully) as it was my Blogfest. So, for those of you who thought I had forgotten, fear not! I have not! (anyone still interested is still welcome to post a story but you'd better get busy writing!)  

Twice a year, at a local bookstore, we receive an invitation for an open house. One in the springtime and one at Christmas time. The Christmas invitation is as much a part of the ritual and tradition of Christmas as purchasing our ornaments. Books are always purchased for Christmas and the Christmas open house (with accompanying discount!) is the perfect opportunity to browse for Christmas gifts. So off we head to the wilds of Cherry Creek to Rob's bookstore on 4th and Fillmore:

The lights are warm and welcoming as we descend the stairs and already we hear laughter and pleasant tete-a-tete betwixt the mulling crowds that stand not too far from the open door.  

A new face greets us at the cash register although it turns out not to be new at all- a former coworker from my Barnes and Noble days has landed this pleasant job here at the Hermitage. Allan is doing is best to keep up at the Cash register after just having started the week before. And I have the pleasure of congratulating him albeit envying his bookish work. Off to the right of the work is the pleasure--  

Catered foods of all sorts were brought in for the occasion and I cannot imagine that anyone went home hungry. The bean dip was terrific as well as the Sesame Seasoned chicken. There were several wines to choose from and desserts to die for. Needless to say, I had not fasted in vain.

In the Nooks and crannies of the shop, the customers were scouring the shelves with gusto...

some were more concerned with First Editions and older gems while others were searching for hidden treasures for their children that might not be found on the shelves of the BnN or Borders anymore...  

Rob (the gent in the Bookishly decorative shirt on the left by the counter), the Proprietor of said establishment stands quietly by hosting and overseeing and finding books when they are in need of finding. And no doubt on an evening like this, with his shop full of folk buying books and perhaps becoming customers who will come back to buy MORE books...    

 is probably quite happy with a life that is built around books that are so much more than the recent bestsellers... books that have stood up against the test of time- books of F. Scott Fitzgerald, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Lawrence Durrell, Jeannette Winterson, Paul West, David Foster Wallace, Gustave Flaubert --  

The writers that wrote and who are still worth reading. 

The kind of writers we should all aspire to be!

if we're going to call ourselves writers, that is...  

(Disclaimer: blogging is not my best writing) 

Riding alongside a lightbeam

Sometime ago, I read Einstein: His Life and Universe having gained an interest in his Theory of Relativity after learning that Lawrence Durrell had leaned heavily on the theory for his Alexandrian Quartet (and I count this among the most amazing fiction I have ever read-- highly recommended reading!!! You will be ready to pack your bags and go to Alexandria after reading the Quartet!!!). While reading the biography I was impressed by the famous physicists way of thinking. He was quoted as saying, "Accumulation of material should not stifle the student's independence...a society's competitive advantage will not come from how well its schools teach the multiplication and periodic tables, but from how well they stimulate imagination and creativity." 

Einstein's ideas were developed first in his imagination. As a young man he would imagine trying to catch up to a light beam- but then in the same thought experiment the complication arose that another person who saw the ostensibly the same thing, did not see the same thing. How could this happen? His imagination eventually led him to develop his 'Theory of Relativity.'

In another section his biographer notes, "Therein lies the key...to Einstein's brilliance and the lessons of his life. As a young student he never did well with rote learning. And later, as a theorist, his success came not from the brute strength of his mental processing power but from his imagination and creativity. He could construct complex equations, but more important, he knew that math is the language nature uses to describe her wonders. So he could visualize how equations were reflected in realities-- how the electromagnetic field equations discovered by James Clerk Maxwell, for example, would manifest themselves to a boy riding alongside a light beam. "

I personally believe that learning the multiplication tables is a foundational piece of education which is lacking today but it has it's place... but I also firmly believe that the lack of imagination and creativity in learning today is also a large piece that is lacking in our schools. Too many of our students are merely learning tools for trades and careers and not learning how to think critically. Thinking critically is an act of creative teaching not an act of rote memorization or plugging in numbers. 

 Einstein once declared, "Imagination is more important than knowledge." 

As a writer, I may be a little biased, but to my way of thinking, all of life begins with imagination. 

So you want to write a novel?

I'd add a few things- one being that if you don't read, don't even think about writing (and if you aren't well read...), but this is terrific -and funny! Click on the picture and it will take you to Youtube video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9fc-crEFDw
I'd love to know what you think! 

Perfection

one

single

flake

flutters 

gently 

down 

into the night

followed by another 

and another until the ground 

is dappled with a winter sheet and finally smothered in a comforter of stifling white

 The hold of darkness is released as the earth glows, 

producing an ethereal beauty that can be felt in the silence of the soul. 

Artists and poets attempt to capture the somber beauty 

but their efforts fall short and result in a copy of very poor relief 

It is, however, a temporal beauty, that is there to be appreciated for what it is in that moment...